Thursday, June 5, 2008

I got dumped

Okay this is a non crafting post, more ranting then anything else so if you wanna read about the crafts scroll past please.

I got dumped. I honestly don't think I've ever been dumped before. I mean I've had break ups, and ended relationships, but no one has ever flat out dumped me. It's a little odd and hard to get used to.

The strange thing is that I was dumped by someone who I was never really in a relationship with. I mean I had Rob, and Rob and I were together for 4 years (2 of which we co-habitated) and really I let that one get beat to death. I mean Rob and I probably should have lasted only 3 years but whatever, and by the time it was over I wasn't grief stricken on obsessed, I was ready to move on.

But this guy, I met him 6 weeks ago, we spoke for 2 and dated for 3 and then wham, out of no where I'm on the express train to dumpsville, population me. It was so out of no where and poorly handled. I mean we went from seeing each other at least twice a week and speaking 5 nights a week to a sudden collapse in communication. When I did finally get him on the phone it was dump time.

Him: Um this isn't working

Me: What do you mean, "isn't working" you were at my house with fucking soup and walking my dog cause I was sick last week.

Him: We're different people

Me: Obviously, you can't date your damn self.

Him: I didn't want to disrespect you.

Me: Then you should have had the balls to do it in person and not over the phone.

Him: Well in person it would have been a drawn out thing I mean your obviously angry

Me: I think I have that right.

Him: Maybe it's just we took things too fast

Me: You're the one who wanted exclusivity

Him: I mean I want to keep talking to you.

Me: I have enough friends

Him: Well maybe it's not done but I need a few days to think things over. I'll call you, I promise.

Me: And do I have a say in the decision.

Him: You can choose not to pick up the phone.

Me: Fine bye, go think.

That was over a week ago, now obviously a few days can be longer then a week but puh-leese, I'm not a moron. You're not going to call, cause you were just trying to get me off the phone.

Today I sent a text message, despite the fact that I was trying hard to put up a strong front and resist the urge to contact. I simply stated
"I have your jacket and a tee-shirt, I'm not holding on to them past tomorrow, let me know what to do with them or I will throw them out."
I have yet to get a response, I am so totally dumped. I need a scotch and a girls weekend.

The strange thing is that I didn't even know him enough to have like any sort of emotional attachment, for all I know he kills bunnies for fun in his spare time, but I think it's because I didn't get to know him, or figure out who he was and how I should respond to him that I'm making myself even crazier. I didn't love him, he didn't love me, so why is this making me more nuts then when I ended a four year relationship?

What did you do when you got dumped, any tricks to coping?


Jacki said...

Dude, that sucks. It's probably bugging you more than you expect because it seems like it just came out of nowhere. You have every right to be bothered/pissed, but try to look at it this way - at least now you know the guy is a tool, and you won't be wasting any more time with him.

As for the clothes? Give them to Goodwill or another charity. At least then someone will get something good out of them. :)

betzi said...

wow, so sorry! I'm with Jacki, at least you know the guy is a tool and found it out sooner rather than later. what a jerk. I'd gather up all his possessions and auction them off as one lot on ebay. that would be very satisfying!


Necia said...

Huggggggggggggs. Sounds to me you need closure, and it's driving you crazy, that he didn't give you any real reason, never mind you didn't even see it coming! I don't know how to tell you to get over it, but you might as well try, more often then not, guys are not considerate beings and don't understand how to tell us what we need to hear vs. what we want to hear, so they either do the latter, or do nothing, which sucks big time. It's summer time now, many men are on the prowl. Almost all my single friends have break ups in the summer. ALL OF THEM! Sucks! I got some goose in the crib.

Anonymous said...

Trust me on this one. I have lived long enough to learn that the ones who dump you are the ones you should thank profusely. Later on, it might have been much harder if you had gotten attached, but more likely, you have gotten a reprieve. He does not sound like the "diamond" you should use your time polishing. Good luck.